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Monthly Archives: December 2019

Shhh. Who Want to Talk About End-Of-Life Planning

The answer to that question is: very few people. We seem to be okay with planning a club meeting, or a vacation, or even tonight’s dinner. Well, end-of-life planning is just another plan to add to your planning list.

Much of it is quite simple. And planning ahead can save much confusion and agony for your survivors, not to mention saving money as well.

First on the list is your will. Don’t assume that your estate will simply go to the next of kin. Grief can do strange things to people—family feuds can and do occur following a death. Think of your will as your gift to your loved ones. It can save many months of being stalled out in probate court.

living will (or sometimes called an advanced directive) relays your wishes in case you become incapacitated. Are there measures that might be taken to keep you alive that you would want to refuse? Then get it down in writing.

No one wants to think of being unable to manage for ourselves. But why not have a power of attorney in effect ahead of time, just in case. This will be a trusted person to manage your affairs. What peace of mind this affords for all who are affected.

Last, but not least, what wishes do you have for your funeral (or memorial service)? This can be contained within your will. Just make sure all details are included so no one has to guess or assume.

When you stop and think about it, these directives aren’t just for the over-sixty bunch. This applies to all ages. So, once you’ve taken care of all your legal matters, urge your children and grandchildren to do the same!

  • December 31, 2019

Senior Citizen? Elderly Person? Aged?

Senior Citizen? Elderly Person? Aged?

Which term do you prefer? Oh, I get it. None of the above!

As we enter into our 2nd and 3rd acts of our lives, we have a choice. We can live in denial, or we can embrace our senior position in life and enjoy all that comes along with it.

One area that I like to emphasize for seniors is our unique position to impart wisdom and insight to those who are younger. You may feel that you’re invisible, or that you’re not being heard by the younger generation. But let’s look at a few ways in which that can be changed.

Make It a Point to Be Kind

Your opinion may not always be asked for, but when the opportunity presents itself always share in a considerate and thoughtful way. Avoid criticizing.

Lead by Example

Believe it or not, young people are watching you. They will learn by how you live, and how you act, more than what you say.

Watch for Times When You Can Offer Support

Young people can make crazy mistakes. Be available to love and encourage and support. What a privilege to guide someone back onto the right path.

Be Ready to Listen

It’s so easy to be quick to judge. But try not to. Do your best to see situations from that young person’s perspective.

Remember: It’s Their Journey—Not Yours

You have the hindsight of decades of experience. Which means you may see hardship looming from decisions that are being made. Just remember this is NOT your journey. Just remain available to support and love. They must be free to make their own choices.

No matter what term you use, you are now in a position to be the elder to someone younger. This can work to give you purpose. And purpose makes it all worthwhile.

  • December 30, 2019

Happy New Year Motivation & Direction

As the new year is upon us, it’s so important to take time for yourself to reflect back on the past year with positivity on what DID happen for you.

It’s also a time to set new goals that are attainable for 2020.

It all begins with attitude. Your attitude has a profound impact on the quality of your life. It can make or break you. Your reactions to events that happen in your life are far more important than the actual events. You can not change the past or predict the future. Challenges will continue to occur in your life. The only thing you have complete control over each and every day is your attitude. (A) Your attitude about yourself is the perfect place to start. Each of us is born with unlimited potential. You self esteem is a function of the continuity between your beliefs & values and your actions. Act with integrity. Create a style.

Create balance in your life. Too much of anything is not healthy. Your lifestyle plan should include moving in a positive direction mentally, physically and spiritually. Positive actions become habits with consistent repetition. Strive to  master yourself, your emotions, and you mind set. Form good habits and become addicted to them. Take a few minutes each day to relax and reduce stress. Establish exercises to work on.

Put at least one-hour aside each day to study. Always continue to learn. Exercise and eat properly to help produce the energy needed to take action. Delay temporary gratification for long term success. Don’t procrastinate, just do it! (Nike) Create a sense of the highest urgency. Organize your personal and professional life.

Surround yourself with positive, optimistic people because it creates the atmosphere you need to achieve. You will get what you need by helping others get what they want. Effective communication with others is critical. Love and respect yourself and others every day. Teamwork and cooperation is essential. Encourage creativity within boundaries. Try not to condemn, complain or criticize. Find out what interests others. Express appreciation for others and make them feel important. Be sincere and enthusiastic. Always be honest and true. Make the most of your talents and abilities. Keep developing and striving for excellence. Gain a reputation of good character. Give from your heart and it will always come back to you ten fold. Give back to others in greater need.

Time is you most precious commodity it is never behind. How you positively and constructively budget your time will have a great impact on your success. A daily calendar is a must. There are daily planners/organizers available that are developed specifically for our business.

Life can, at times, get a bit overwhelming. When it does its okay to take a break and rest, but never quit. Go punch a pillow, cream, cry, pray, meditate or talk with someone who cares. After you rebound get back to it. Almost all successful and happy people have experienced many painful failures until they realized that there are no failures only outcomes. Persist. Be courageous. Be determined. Always maintain a sense of humor. Take time to live love and laugh.

B Bop

  • December 30, 2019

After Sixty – Own a Pet Or Not.

If you already own a pet (one who is probably more like your own kid than a pet), then this message is not for you. But if you’re past the sixty demarcation line, and you live alone, and you’ve been tossing around the idea of having a pet, here are a few notes that may help in making your final decision.

Perhaps you’re thinking a pet is more trouble than it’s worth. That, plus the expenses of pet supplies, pet food, and vet bills, you’re just not sure. In spite of all that, studies show that the benefits of pet ownership far outweigh any downside.

Check out these positive effects:

  • Post heart-attack patients with pets had an increased survival rate of one year over non-pet owners
  • Pets help reduce feelings of isolation and loneliness
  • Elderly pet owners have lower blood pressure, triglyceride, and cholesterol levels
  • Older adult pet owners are less likely to be depressed
  • Hospitalized patients reported less pain and used fewer analgesics during and after an animal visit
  • US adults who walk dogs accumulate at least 30 minutes of walking in bouts of at least 10 minutes

Another research finding revealed that owning a pet gives the owner a sense of purpose. Giving a reason to get up in the morning. Our pets need us for their well-being, and they reciprocate with unconditional love and affection.

Did you know that some animal shelters offer a “foster-a-pet” program? If you’re still unsure, why not foster a dog or cat for a short time and see. You might be pleasantly surprised!

  • December 27, 2019

How to Fight Age Discrimination

Age discrimination, just like any discrimination based on race or gender, is illegal. The Age Discrimination in Employment Act of 1967 (ADEA), which celebrates its 50th anniversary this year, prohibits discrimination against workers aged 40 and above throughout all stages of service, counting hiring and layoffs. In spite of the law, it can be hard to succeed age discrimination cases in court. Here are five things you must know about these laws:

Age discrimination can be hard to prove, so be sure to keep careful notes of any evidence

According to a 2009 U.S. Supreme Court verdict, plaintiffs have to meet a high burden of proof for age discrimination than for other types of discrimination. The clearest pointer of intentional discrimination is when a worker demonstrates that an employer is acting because of faith that an employee has diminished ability because of the age, says Patricia Barnes, an employment discrimination specialist and author of Overcoming Age Discrimination in Employment. A further strong sign is if a supervisor makes remarks about age or sends younger workers to a training course, but not older workers, Barnes says. “I always recommend keeping a notepad about each incident, who was there and how it made you feel,” she suggests. Then, it’s easier to exhibit a pattern in court.

Pull in professionals

Human resources officers are skilled in distinguishing age discrimination; moreover, it is necessary to keep in mind that they labor for your employer, not for you. You can complain about your HR section, which may afterward examine or converse with your manager. You might as well discuss with an attorney to observe if you have a case to follow in court. In addition, you can get in touch with your local Equal Employment Opportunity Commission (EEOC) office to converse how to file a charge and for aid resolving the charge with your employer.

Winning an age discrimination case might be hard, but it is not impossible

One of the largest age-discrimination cases in current history concerned a then-64-year-old Staples employee in Los Angeles, who was called an “old goat” in staff meetings and finally was fired. Adjudicators awarded the man $26 million. An abridged payment of $16 million was upheld on a plea. Presently, AARP Foundation is supporting numerous age-discrimination cases, counting ones against Spirit AeroSystems and PwC, aka PricewaterhouseCoopers, both of which are waiting. “We are hopeful that our participation and success in these cases will send a message to employers that age discrimination is intolerable and will not go unconcealed,” says Laurie McCann, senior attorney with AARP Foundation Litigation.

There is power in numbers

If you lose your job as a result of a group termination and you suspect age discrimination, reflect on working with your pretentious coworkers to follow the legal action. It can reinforce your negotiating position and also help reduce costs.

Staying abreast of technology can help protect you.

The Savvy Senior’s syndicated columnist, Jim Miller, says that workers may be able to shun age discrimination in the first place by making efforts to stay up to date on technology. “A lot of people get discriminated against because the world has approved them by from a technology standpoint,” he stated. Taking online courses or other forms of training can facilitate, showing that you can still do extremely well at work, at any age.

It is important to note that discriminating anyone based on their age is in no way acceptable in the society. You should be able to judge everyone as an equal irrespective of their age, gender or race. This is the only way in which the society will prosper in future!

  • December 27, 2019

Changing the Perception of Millennials towards Baby Boomers

Today’s 18-to-29-year-olds are clinging so tightly to the information they have within their disposal, about Baby Boomers. In my own opinion, I believe they have been fed with more negatives than positives, thanks to the conflicts over gender, sexuality, and race that were characteristic of the 1960s—and have come to bear in every national election in their lifetime.

Millennials have watched their parents (who are mostly Baby Boomers) spend over 20 years in jobs they hated, and only suddenly realized they shouldn’t have been at it in the first place, or wished they got out of it 10 years ago. The same parents that advised them, time and time over again to work hard and climb the corporate ladder so they can enjoy retirement.

That alone sends out the wrong signal, which further fuels the already negative perception they have about Baby Boomers. So would it be healthy for this negative perception to continue? Can it be changed?

This mass stereotyping shouldn’t be allowed to go on. We can begin to see things from a different perspective, like trying to understand this older generation and what they can offer, rather than blame them for the failures of the past. They may have goofed off and their ideas may be outdated in our technology-driven world, but that does not mean they can’t still contribute meaningfully to the present economy.

As painful as most of us may feel for the economic woes, they caused us, we can’t obviously ship them all off to an island. Our best bet is to understand and view them in the perspective of what they have done well; but I’m optimistic that the next generation of leaders won’t make the same mistakes.

Let’s not continue to be the armchair critics of these fuddy-duddy Boomers; let’s focus on what they have done right and build on it, that way, we will be engendering a peaceful coexistence for a better economy and a brighter tomorrow.

  • December 26, 2019

Stress – Friend or Foe?

Aha. So, you thought that in your after-sixty years you might slow down and life might be a little easier. A little calmer. But no, these days you’re watching those days on the calendar whipping by and you’re constantly running to catch up.

And the stress… Well, let’s just say, it’s taking longer and longer to unwind when you lie down to sleep at night.

You no doubt are already aware 1. That continued stress is detrimental to your health, and 2. men handle stress much differently than women.

Let both of these facts lead you to take action and get a handle on stress. Stop allowing it to ruin your day. (And your nights.)

How do men handle stress? They go into problem-solving mode. With their more analytical minds, they almost “attack” the stress by figuring out ways to solve the problem at hand. Why not steal their modus operandi and stay healthy?

First, stop putting up with your stress. Learn to recognize it. Next,

practice going into problem-solving mode—and do it quickly.

Write out your stressor in a notebook then write out WHY it bothers you so much. (That exercise alone may show you how fruitless it is to stress over it.)

But don’t stop there. Next to it, write down possible solutions or actions to deal with the stressor. Do it point by point. Then, take the required steps to carry out your solution.

Your life is meant to be enjoyed, not endured. Stress is inevitable, but you can learn to deal with it and give your health and longevity a welcome boost.

  • December 25, 2019

Not Growing in Age, But Growing in Grace

This morning when I GOT UP WITH A GREAT ATTITUDE, I walked to the bathroom humming a tune and with every step my bones where also jookin and jiving like a rock & roll band!

We’re getting to that age where we hear “snap, crackle and pop” more times by moving around than we did as kids eating the cereal. We may not like, where we are physically, mentally or emotionally, but why should that stop us?

We shouldn’t even have to act our age, here are some great ways to improve your health and happiness and grow old gracefully:

ACT As “If”… WHAT? Here, is The MAGIC “If”

The Magic “If” is a highly effective tool for actors. When an actor starts to ask themselves “what if” questions, they can discover whole new elements that can be used anytime they approach the creation or rediscovery of a role. And you can use this technique as well, its a supposition. Suppose you where acting 10 to 15 years younger than your age…

Yep, it can be as simple as that – start acting younger than you are. Like I mentioned in my book Stop Acting Your Age – you can develop “a character, personality, or persona that’s 10 to 15 years younger than your actual age (or the age on your driver’s license.” Just start acting, dressing and doing things you enjoyed 10 – 15 years ago and slowly this persona becomes a habit and you’ll live and feel so much better!

Make New Goals

So, you’re and empty nester. You have raised your family and retired from your job – that doesn’t mean you have to hang up your hat or apron.

Make new life goals and work towards them. Want to learn a new language, write a book, or try something you’ve never done before? Go for it! There are low-cost classes at your local college, library, or Department of Recreation. There are also many courses offered for free online as well.

As proven in a study by GeroPsych, a leading international journal, proves that setting new goals and life-long learning keeps you motivated, stimulates your mind, and improves your overall well-being.

Share Yourself

Just as learning something new has profound psychological effects on your health, so does teaching and sharing with others.

As I mentioned in my previous blog “They’re not Old, They’re Gold” – 59% of seniors are involved in volunteering. Sharing yourself with the younger generations is a great way to feel revitalized and younger. Go to the places I mentioned above for learning and offer your help and experience there.

So, grow with grace and style and show the youngsters how it’s done.

  • December 25, 2019

You’re Not in 7th Grade—So Why the Insecurity?

****Over-sixty women are asking one another—and themselves—this question quite often. “Why the insecurity?”

One would think after living so many decades of life, insecurity would be a challenge that would have been eradicated long ago. But that’s not always true. What we find is that the insecurity is there beneath the surface, masked and hidden sometimes, but still there.

This will come to light especially when photos or videos come into play. Almost to a person, over-sixty women dread being in front of a camera.

Isn’t it interesting that women have raised children to adulthood—sometimes on their own; they’ve pushed through barriers to work on assembly lines and sit in boardrooms; some have even risked their livelihood to call out men for overt or subtle sexist acts? But showing up in front of a camera to faceless others can shake them to their core. And these days, cameras (iPhones) are everywhere.

This is why in our Stop Acting Your Age Course, we ask women to take “before-and-after” photos. In many ways, our course, and this simple action of taking selfies, works wonders in dispelling the insecurity that lurks beneath the surface. In easy steps, each one (in her own way), pushes through the fear.

It comes from discovering the balance between caring too much what others think, and being comfortable with self!

Seventh grade was many years ago. Time to let go of those insecurities that plagued you back then. You’ve come through a lot in the ensuing years. Time to focus on your victories and leave the insecurities behind you.

  • December 24, 2019

A Formula For Success, Which Will Work Every Time.

The basic unit of a lifetime is a single day. And a single day in our careers is made up of certain acts which each of us must perform. We need only perform successfully each act of a single day to enjoy a successful day. Repeat this each day for a week, and you have a successful week. If you will only do each day the things you know you should do each day and do them as successfully as you possibly can, you will be successful all the years of your life. You don’t have to run around in circles trying to do a great many things. Don’t try to do tomorrows or next week’s work today. Just do today’s as best you can and leave tomorrows for tomorrow. That is really all there is to it The important thing is not to slight a single act during the day, because sometimes we do not know how really important some little act may be. The minute one rises in the morning, he is faced with certain things to do. He should be cheerful, for example. A person has the choice of being cheerful or sad. With these two alternatives, no one with any sense or understanding of life would choose to be unhappy. Then there is our work. Have you ever thought how boring and uneventful life would be without our work? Here again, work consists of a series of things to do.

We have only to perform each one as best we can to be successful all day long. Finally, if we can go to bed again in the comforting knowledge that we have done the best we could do for that one day, we can know that we are successful. As Emerson put it: “Self-trust is the first secret of success, the belief that if you are here the authorities of the universe put you here, and for a cause.”

Your job, then, is to play out the role you have undertaken to the best of your ability. Success is nothing more nor less than this. We only become dull and bored and uneasy with others and ourselves when we shirk what we know full well we should be doing. The happiest and most contented people are those who each day performs to the best of their ability. The truth about success is long overdue. There is nothing mysterious about it. Success can be predicted and measured with mathematical precision and will come to us in the exact degree of the effectiveness with which we love each day. B Bop

  • December 23, 2019
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